One of the things that yoga has taught me is to be nonreactive.  I’ve learned, and am still practicing, that if my body is in an uncomfortable or stressful position that I should take a deep breath and relax into the sensation rather than freak out!  I practice developing a calm, nonreactive mind, and in doing so I feel confident, strong & peaceful.  In this confident, strong & peaceful state I realize that I can handle anything.  I realize that I have more power in letting go, than in fighting.  I realize that my yoga practice is just as much mental as it is physical.  I can do this.

Nope...not me!

I’m sure we’ve all had thoughts like this:  “Yea, you better get out of that pose, you’re going to hurt yourself”.  “How much longer are we going to hold this, I’m about to die!”.  Or, “I can’t do this any longer.  Why is this crazy ass teacher making us hold so long?  She’s not doing this pose, so she has no idea what we’re going through.  I can’t do this”.

I’ve noticed that when thoughts like this go through my head it just makes the pose so much worse.  Taking a deep breath and just allowing the sensations to be there, without judgment, opens me up to a more peaceful world.  It takes me deeper within myself and I begin to feel a sense of calmness.  When I get to this calm state, then I find this intelligence and it guides me.  That’s what tells me if I really need to come out of the pose because I may injure myself, not my mind.  My mind will make up all kinds of things!

So I’ve learned this and continually practice it on my mat, but what’s really cool is that I can take what I’ve learned on my mat and use the same principals in my normal everyday life.  When life throws me an unexpected curve ball, how am I going to react?  What am I thinking?  Am I dwelling in how awful things are (or could get)?  Do I want to bail out or hide and ignore the situation?

When that curve ball first appears my immediate reaction might be to cuss, pout, be bitter, mad, or sad, but soon (if not immediately) I remember my yoga practice.  I remember that I have more power in my peace, than in my rage.  I remember that no matter what is going on around me, my strong, positive mind will make it all better.  I remember that if I can just connect to my inner intelligence, I’ll know what to do.  I shift my perspective and look for the bright side in the situation, or if I don’t see a bright side at that particular moment, I realize that regardless everything will be okay.   Just like on my mat, my hip isn’t going to fall off…Everything will be okay.

**Hell no, that’s not me in the photo!**

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My assignment today is to “take the time to focus on yourself. Appreciate and give thanks for your unique personality, skills and talents.”

Here we go:

I’m thankful that I know who I am and am true to myself.  I’m thankful for the confidence in who I am and that I don’t feel like I need to be anyone else.

I appreciate the mom that I am, the wife that I am, the friend that I am, but above all that I appreciate who I am.  I know that being a mom, wife, and friend are just labels that we put upon ourselves, and above that, above the ego is me, and I love me.

I’m grateful that I’m laid back and easy going.  I’m thankful that I’m productive and efficient.  I can multitask like nobody’s business (you should see what all I’ve got going on right this moment ) or I can focus on one thing and be completely present for it.

I’m so thankful that I’m healthy and strong.

I’m thankful that I live life in the present moment as best I can, and that I have developed a great sense of awareness.  I appreciate that I’m aware of my thoughts and of my feelings and can change them if I’m not liking the way I feel.

I’m so, so grateful that I have a positive perspective.  I love that I see life through rose colored glasses, and that it’s always sunny and 70 in Katland.

I appreciate my sense of humor (even if I am the only one laughing…those who know me well know that I crack myself up all the time), my wit, my creativity, my passions (that I know what my passions are!), and my ability to let go.

Thank you, Me.  Love, Me

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I skipped making a blog post yesterday on the gratitude challenge because I really wasn’t quite sure what to write.  I was just thinking I’d be repeating myself, which is fine if I’m drunk!  haha  So I just let it go.

The assignment was to write about the challenge thus far and how it has changed my perspective.  This entire year, starting Jan. 1, I’ve been writing in a gratitude journal, so this challenge wasn’t really new to me.  What was new and why I wanted to take the challenge was because I wanted to blog about it everyday, and be accountable to you.

I would have to say that my perspective is always positive, so the challenge hasn’t necessarily changed my perspective about anything.  BUT, and here’s where it gets interesting…

There were 3 times yesterday where out of the blue, just at totally random times I would feel an overwhelming sense of gratitude and appreciation.  I had this amazing feeling of just how awesome my life is.  It was an energy that came over me that made me feel high, so to speak.  The buzz didn’t last a real long time or anything, but it did keep me going for a while.

I’m so thankful for that feeling because I know that appreciation is an energetic feeling that vibrates at a really high frequency and when we can align energetically to this high frequency we are really connected to all that we are.  (If you are totally confused, read this post)  And, I know that the more we feel good (which gratitude and appreciation make us feel that way) the more good will come our way!

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Today I’m grateful that my youngest son turned 2 years old.  I’m grateful that we had an “intimate” party for him that was SO much fun.  I’m grateful that we were able to buy him lots of gifts, had a fabulous dinner (I made chicken with spinach, pears & feta – yum!), that my mom-in-law joined us, and that we were all together.  I’m grateful that we’re all healthy, happy & enjoying each other.

I’m so grateful to have my children in my life.  They have brought me so much joy.  They mean the world to me, and I’m so grateful that I’m responsible for them.  They have taught me patience, compassion, how to let go and how to be more present.  They show me what’s truly important.  And, they have taught me that love is infinite!!

I can’t thank you enough!  I love you, Max & Miles

*********************************************************************************************************************

So I didn’t skip out on day 6 of this 21 day gratitude challenge.  The assignment was to call someone and tell them how much you appreciate them.  I did.  I called my mom.  Made me feel good and I know I made her day!  Thanks again, Mom.  I truly appreciate you.

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One of the things I’ve learned, and still practice, in yoga is to be nonreactive.  As I practice breathing, relaxing, and letting go while my shoulders are burning and my thigh is yelling at me, I become aware that my mind is more calm and I get a sense of ease, strength, and peace.  It can be so easy to have a negative reaction when the teacher calls out a pose I don’t like, or when a sub walks in that I wasn’t expecting, but all that does is make the situation worse.  If I change my reaction to these things and make them more positive, or don’t react at all then my outcome is way better.

You choose how you want to respond.

As I take what I’ve learned on my yoga mat and apply it to real life, I realize that everything we experience (good or bad) is because of our reaction or response to it.  This same nonreactive principal that I’ve learned in yoga can also be applied to our life.  Jack Canfield has a formula that he teaches:

E + R = O  (Events + Responses = Outcome)

The idea is that everything you experience is because of how you responded to an earlier event in your life.  If you aren’t enjoying the outcomes that you are experiencing right now, there are basically two choices you can make.

1.  You can blame the event for the outcome.

There’s a ton of external factors that we can blame.  We can blame the economy for not having a job.  We can blame our boss or our clients for having a bad day.  We can blame the rain for not working out.  We can blame our lack of money for not starting our dream business.  We can blame a lack of time for eating fast food.  Excuses.  Excuses.  Excuses.

We’ve all done this right?  I know I have.  Going back to yoga…I was in a workshop last week and I noticed I was making excuses for why I wasn’t getting into a pose.

There’s no doubt that these blame factors exist, but it’s up to us to overcome them.  There are tons of people who are still employed and very successful.  I see people out walking in the rain all the time.  For every impossible thought we have, there are many out there that think it is possible.

OR

2.  You can change your responses to the events until you get the outcomes you want.

Can we respond differently to the events that happen?  If we get fired, maybe we take the time to educate ourselves and learn a new skill.  If the boss is being a hard ass, maybe we have some compassion for him rather than gossiping with other coworkers about how awful he is.  He may be having a lot of personal issues at home, or had a father that was hard on him.

We can change our thinking, the way we communicate, and our behavior because really that’s all that we have control over anyway.  We don’t necessarily have control over any extremal event.  All we have control over is our responses to them!

We tend to get stuck in our habits and the way we respond  to our children, our spouses, the traffic, and our bosses.  So we must gain control of our thoughts, our behavior, the images we hold in our head, and our dreams.

We need to know what we want, and then everything we think, say, and do needs to align with our goals, our intentions, and our values.

In the words of Jack Canfield: If we all experience the same EVENT, the OUTCOME you get will be totally dependent upon your RESPONSE to the situation.

If you don’t like your outcomes, you must change your responses.  It’s that simple!

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Do you worry about things all the time?  Do you fret over everything?  Do you think of the worse possible scenarios?  If so, do you realize that worrying is just your imagination creating something that you don’t want?

I catch myself worrying about the craziest, most ridiculous stuff!  Actually, it’s not really worrying that I do so much, but I’ll just have crazy ideas pop in my head.  For instance, almost every time I drive over a train track I think, for just a brief moment, what if a train comes barreling down and slams into me.  Or if I’m driving behind a truck that has a ladder or something sticking off the back I might think what if that ladder slides off the truck and goes right into my windshield and nails me in the face.  Basically, I just think of freak accidents happening to me &/or my family.  It’s so weird.  I hate it.

Like I said, worrying is just the imagination creating scenarios that you don’t want!  So, when I have these wild thoughts I immediately catch myself doing it and I snap out of it.  “Only good things come to me” is one of my mantras!

Being a firm believer in the Law of Attraction, I understand that thinking about things I don’t want only brings those unwanted things to me.  So I stop in my tracks (not on the train tracks – haha) and I think about what I want.  I only want good things to come to me.  And honestly…only good things do come to me.

If you worry a lot all you’re doing is imagining things happening that you don’t want to happen.  With all that energy focused on those unwanted things, you’re likely to manifest what you don’t want.  Then you get this scenario that you don’t want and it causes more worry.  More worry, creates more worry.  It’s a vicious circle!

The good news is that this works in the opposite way as well.  The less you worry, the less stuff you have to worry about.

The worrying has to stop.  Seriously.  If you think about it, most of the things you worry about don’t ever happen anyway so what’s the point?  It’s wasted energy.  It’s puts you in a funk, and it causes stress.  And I won’t even get on the topic of what stress does to you!!  Worry cannot change your circumstance, it only enhances it.

So here’s the deal.  Next time you start to worry, notice what you’re doing, and immediately stop.  Give yourself a mantra or affirmation.  They’re extremely powerful.

Only good things come to me.

I choose to let go and allow goodness.

I am safe.

I choose to let go of things I have no control over.

I trust that everything will work out.

At first you may be saying these things as you’re rolling your eyes, but eventually you start to believe it.  When you start to believe it, you start to have faith that everything will work out.  That faith is what allows you to stop worrying.

**Side note: I sell charms that help you to remember your affirmation.  They work beautifully.  Click here.**

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I was listening to 1310am The Ticket this morning (sorry, Honey!).  It’s sports talk with lots of guy talk mixed in.  They had a segment about men going through mid life crisis, but then the segment turned more into how they are so unhappy in their marriages.  There were tons of emails coming in about how these guys hate going home because all their wives do is bitch, yell, and complain.  I would hate to come home too if I had to come home to that, so I don’t blame them at all!

It reminded me of what a lot of my female yoga students have told me.  They’ve told me that their husbands really encourage them to come to yoga class.  Their husbands say they’re a lot more relaxed and just better after taking a class.  I can totally see why!

As women we’re expected to basically do everything, especially if you’re a working mom…that’s a lot of work!  There’s so much that goes on from the time “work” is over until the time we lay our head down at night.  Where is “me” time??

So there’s work stress and then all the stuff that needs to be done once you get home but don’t have time to do it.  You’re just happy with getting dinner on the table, kids homework done, and baths!  Not only does stuff pile up in the house, but “stuff” piles up on your shoulders, in your hips, on your back & neck, and in your head!

Stuff piling up for a little while is pretty manageable, but eventually you bust.  You bust out yelling.  You bust out bitching, you bust out your back, you bust out headaches, and possibly even bust out a heart attack.

Ladies, we need “me” time.  Seriously.  You have to make time for yourself.  If you’re not good, how can you expect to be good for your kids, your family, or anyone else that needs you?  I understand it may sound selfish, but it’s not!

I obviously think yoga is one of the best things you can do for your “me” time.  It not only gets you moving and exercising, but it is so unbelievably awesome for your head…your mind.  It’s basically a moving meditation.  It takes you away from your worries, your to do lists, your responsibilities, and your stress.  It gives your thinking mind a break, and in doing so, you’re more productive and you can creatively come up with solutions to your problems.  It may give you a different perspective and you may even realize that everything is okay.  It’s okay to not be perfect.  It’s okay to just let go and not be so uptight.  It gets you connected to your true self and makes you feel more confident.

It gets all that “stuff” out of your body and out of your mind.  At first it may just be temporary, which is great…a little relief before you go home to your kids and hubby, but the more you practice yoga the more the “stuff” stays away.

I can’t stress (no punn intended!) enough how great yoga &/or meditation is for your “me” time, but it can be anything from a pedicure, to a massage, to just taking a long, hot bath.  I know it can be hard to find time, especially if you’re a working mom, but this is a must.  I promise you…you will be more productive (mentally & physically)!

I would love to hear your feedback.  Do you currently do yoga &/or meditate and if so, how has it made you better?  Are you one of those people whose husbands (or wives) encourage you to go take a class?  What else do you do for “me” time?  Has your marriage or relationships improved once you started doing yoga?  Let’s talk!!

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Okay, so I’m limited in time today to write something profound and genius like I usually do…haha  But – this came into my inbox and I find it so enlightening (no punn intended…read more and you’ll see what I mean!).

“Enlightenment means literally aligning to the Energy of my Source. And genius is only about focusing. Law of Attraction takes care of everything else. Physical humans often want to make enlightenment about finding some process and moving through the process that has been pre-described. But true enlightenment is moving to the rhythm of the internal inspiration that is coming in response to the individual desire. Enlightenment is about allowing my connection to the Source that is me for the fulfillment of the things that I have individually defined here in my time/space reality. That’s as good as it gets!”  –Abraham

Excerpted from an Ester & Jerry Hicks workshop in Boulder, CO on Saturday, June 7th, 2003

Sweet, huh?  So your job (and mine) is to know what you want, know what you desire, get in touch with your Source Energy, and then just let go and allow! Aaaahhh, so sweet~

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I have a lot of favorite yoga poses, but if I just had to pick one it would be Warrior II (Virabhadrasana II).  It appears fairly simple, but so much can be achieved in this pose (so much can be felt in this pose if you hold it long enough!!).

At first, it’s all about just trying to stay in the pose while your thigh and shoulders are screaming at you, but once you find proper alignment and connect with your breath, Warrior II is so peaceful.  It’s like a peaceful warrior; strong, focused, and courageous!

With practice, you begin to feel how strong the thigh is and come to appreciate it, and the shoulders are there, but you’re relaxed.  This feels good.  You keep holding.  Then maybe it’s not so good, but wait I’m thinking about my thigh.  Breathe!  Okay, feels better.

As thoughts like this go on in your head, you must remember to breathe.  It’s with the breath that this pose becomes meditative.  And, it’s the breath that allows you to relax when you’re in an uncomfortable position.  It’s the breath that allows you to just be in the pose, rather than doing the pose.

Here’s some alignment points (based on the picture above):

• The left leg is bent to a 90 degree angle.
• Weight is on the center of the left heel, and the toes relaxed (knee is stacked over the heel).
• Open the hip by taking the left knee towards the left “baby” toe.
• Lift the left hip crease off the left thigh (this will help get the spine vertical).
• Outside edge of the right foot is grounded down.
• The spine is extended upward in a vertical line.
• Arms are open out extending in both directions, feeling the arms strong and long (so to gain space in the shoulder, elbow, and wrist joints).
• Shoulders are relaxed down, away from the ears.
• Gaze is out over your left hand.
• Hold & BREATHE.
• Then hit the other side!

Physically, Warrior II will increase your stamina, and strengthen your legs, ankles, and arms.  It’s great for stretching and opening your chest, shoulders, hips, and groin.  It relieves backaches, great for flat feet, and get this…infertility!  It even helps with carpal tunnel and sciatica.

Practice Warrior II often…it’s a great spiritual teacher!

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As I’ve gone through my spiritual journey (and still on it!) I’ve learned so much.  Early on, though, there’s one thing I learned from a book by Don Miguel Ruiz called The Four Agreements that really changed my life.  Actually, his entire book changed my life, but one the the agreements, in particular, made my life easier!

DON’T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY

“Nothing others do is because of you.  What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream.  When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”

This is a HUGE statement!

Have you ever tried to do something only to have someone tell you what a terrible idea it is?  Have you ever been cussed at and wondered what the *%$? you did?  When you begin to understand that it’s not personal, you begin to have less stress in your life, and like the book says, you begin to suffer less.

I remember when my husband and I were just dating and he told me he “needed some space”.  What?  Really?  That freaked me out.  I took it so personally.  I would sit and stress about what I did wrong, and I truly suffered over it.  I felt awful.  Now, looking back on it, it had absolutely nothing to do with me.  He was going through whatever he was going through and it wasn’t about me at all.

It’s so refreshing to know that whatever someone says or does is not about you.  That person may be having a bad day and take it out on you, but if you know that it’s not you, it’s them, then it makes your life so much easier.  What that person most likely needs is compassion, rather than you yelling back, getting defensive, or copping an attitude.

I know this is easier said than done, so here’s a few tips to help you let it go and show compassion.

1.  You are inherently a good person, so have confidence.  What others say to you or about you does NOT define who you are!

2.  Take a few deep breaths before responding or reacting.  This will give you a few moments to relax and get grounded.  And, in that time the other person may cool down a bit too.

3.  Ignore the situation.  If you stay positive and don’t give attention to what the other person is saying or doing, this may actually help that person, and it’ll no doubt help you.

4.  Realize that the person may be exhausted, pressured, or just immature so what they really need is your help, advice, or a shoulder.

So the next time you’re feeling sensivite, just remember what Eleanor Roosevelt said “No one can make you feel inferior without your permission.” When you take things personally, you’re allowing someone else’s opinion of you be more important than the opinion of yourself.  What you think and believe about yourself is so important.  You are worthy.  You are love.  You deserve the best.  So don’t take anything personally!!

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